Fanny Bloom

Shit

Fanny Bloom
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Shit

Shit

Every day is a grey day
I know it's all my fault
I also know that you tell yourself
That I ruin everything
Whenever I leave
With your eyes
That I can't see anymore
So then, so then
What remains?
A needle and a thread
Made to mend
 
Boys like you deserve the best
But the best isn't me
I even cut my hair
And since
I'm less beautiful
So what are you doing
Here still
Tell me, tell me
What remains?
A needle and a thread
Made to mend
 
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sydrhill sydrhill
submitted on 19 Lug 2013 - 22:50
Give a shoutout to sydrhill

Commenti 2

crimson_antics crimson_antics M
20 Lug 2013, 00:14

Hi, glad to see you back :)

Just some details (and feel free to reword my suggestions, of course):

"I also know that you told yourself": tell/are telling

"That can't see anymore": That I can't see anymore

"And yet, and yet: So then, so then,
Does he remain?": What remains?

"And then": And since/ever since/since then/you get the point

"Yet what are you doing": So...

"Tell me, tell e": typo ;)

sydrhill sydrhill A
20 Lug 2013, 00:46

Thanks so much!! And it's good to be back :bigsmile: It's been too long :D

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